Friday, August 4, 2006

showing off


e cup lyn called me that day.

she said in utmost embarassed voice

"i cannot believe i cried in front of lap cheong that day!!!! so memalufying!!!"

in response...."well at least now we know that you sure passliao: P"

"....."
"....i was thinking bout that too!!: P"
"but so memalufying!!!"

thinking bout it...of courselar its memalufying. i had my fair share of dripping overflowing tears in front of people before. not in the movies or some sad accident. but in situations where its ...like..telling to people that you are weak. you need to cry. you cant just put on your mask anymore.

although i really hate myself sometimes cause i cant really control my emotions. in fact i find it really hard...basically you can see everything written on my face... thats why i suck in lying. but on the other hand..i actually find it...i dont know. when e cup lyn said that i felt...i felt shes human, not that shes not..(shes actually an orrgui) but then...cause she hardly show emotions(esp sad ones...why no one show sad emotions when everyone is supposed to share feelings together regardless its sad or happy)

not that she doesnt show emotions... but its rare to see sad ones. esp when she cannot take the pressure anymore and broke down...make me wanna kneel next to her and pat her head. kiss her forehead. give her ice cream..i know that sounded like.."wth bulat...u think you manjaing 6 year old kid?"

to me when people are sad...a small gesture tells a lot...this is how i sek my frens...this is the way i am... you may do it differently... but i do it this way(thats why i grow fat..1 ice cream for you...1 ice cream for me...some ppl when sad dont wanna eat but smile anyway cause u had the heart to treat them icecream...in the end..who eat if they dont want? i eatlorh)

so its really okay to show emotions...i dont know ...somehow i feel more human...or maybe everyone only shows emotions to people they are closest and comfortable with...er...hmm..like how im not used to smiling at people im closed with when we pass by(very weird wan..sama class but not close i dont even bother to smile...hahahaha~_~ terrible) but i guess this is under mannersliao....

okay im lost.. but to summarize what im trying to say(this is why im not in some debate team...make everyone blur den just summarize it onlylar to save my speech)

It aint life if you aint happy. But it aint life either if you aint sad.angry.dreamy.funny.cheeky.naughty.
kawaii.nosey. LOL. after all we ARE humans with emotions~~open up to the world and the world will open up to you..both arms and legs: P

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